In other words...

Current mood:cheerful

this is what my friend Brittany wrote on her myspace blog but she put it in such excellent terms that I told her I was going to use it on mine as well because it was such a day that it was hard to describe. This is Britts story but you can see how the day impacted us all... here ya go so... us LIT-ers had a team day...usually these are not so much fun.. so i wasn't expecting too much.. some good craic and seeing people.. but my goodness!!!.....i don't really know if i can describe the day.. okay so.. God loves me.. He isn't letting me stay in this place- this started for me at the retreat in Nov... then i read Waking the Dead and Blue Like Jazz.. and along w/ my classes for school and my everyday experiences of church and how i was feeling- all combined in me to make me think- 'i do not want this if this is it' and i knew deep deep in my heart that it is so much more.. but i wasn't seeing it.... i went to a church 4 sundays ago and i came home and was like-'things need to change or i am done w/ this' and God spoke to me and i knew even in all my frustration- He was it.. and not all the other things we learn from home and culture and whatever else teaches us lessons that we dont even know we learn and somehow we have these beliefs that are not what we need... and then this past saturday was a day w/ the ones i have here- of talking about this- and being community.. and believing and having faith in this God who is all powerful and wants to save the kids we are with... and that night the speaker was about thepower of prayer... and so i began to pray again for these ones.. and things changed- they got crazy.... and t's great- b/c God wants these ones.. and its' gonna happen- we just need to be beggars and be desperate for their souls..whatever it takes... and then yesterday..... i have never met someone who loves jesus sooo much- and who knows as deep as you can get- that God loves him back. it was like truth came into the room and sat down w/ us, and taught us about life- and the things that are real.. and the things that matter.. and that is being w/ God- that is worshipping God- that is Communicating and being intimate... he didn't teach us principles of anything. he showed us what it is.... to be loved absolutely by God- to believe that.. and to love God w/ everything you are..from the moment he began to talk i cried..i cried because He gets it, i cried b/c it was beautiful, i cried b/c this is what my heart knows to be true- and is desperately seeking, i cried b/c this is how people experience jesus... bc/ he was vulnerable- and everything he said was honest and true and pure... and because i met him- i know now that God loves me absolutely.. and i would say it before.. and logically its a nice thought and makes sense... but i never knew it- in the deep parts. and i can say that God is drunk w. love for me... he's crazy in love w/ me... and He loves me b/c i am me.. not beacuse of anything i do or don't do.... b/c He knows me and still loves me.... and loves me because He knows me... and i want to be close to Him.. and i want people to know God b.c they see Him in me...i hope i get lots more days like that

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If God's Smiling....

Current mood:enthralled

Last night we finished our mission week to Dromore. It was nothing short of amazing, the best week of AXIOM/LIT so far. What was so amazing about it you might ask...well I will be happy to tell you. We worked in Dromore High every day and the YFC drop-in every night. The work itself was good, and tiring, and all the usual but spiritually I felt like I was flying...we all did. It is was such an encouragement to my soul. The last while there I had been finding hard, its a process God has me in. First the throne of my hear where God needs to be always...most recently a reminder that I am not here for myself, its about Jesus and what He did on the cross. This is not my home, I will never feel ok with living here, because I was meant for heaven. Anyways, back to Dromore. Every night at drop-in they had prayer for the night and the kids and each other and then they would put on the Hillsong DVD and we would all stand around the drop-in worshiping together. One night we did this while a few kids were still there, one of those kids became a Christian that night and the next night was there at our show and helping us load the van and all. Amazing. Maybe the whole experience isn't something that i can actually put into words, maybe it was just God, and He let me experience His power in such an awesome way. The song we would sing every day the coarse went... "If I had wings I would fly, cause all that I need, you are and if the world caved in around me to you I'd still hold on Cause youe everything I need Your the one that created me Jesus, because of you....I'm Free!" The verses say things like, "would you believe me if I said that life could be all that you want it to be,would you believe me if I said you don't have to have all the answers before you step out in faith!" and then the guys that work there,....they believe in God's power....and sure we all do, but its different. I think the difference is that they live it...every day they commit to the Lord as a group-as staff, then they take communion together and they worship the Lord together and give Him all the glory that is due His name. No one changes lives but the Lord. One night someone prayed that we were all on a journey to heaven and we wanted to take as many with us as possible. Another thing my friend Andy said was "if God is smiling at me, I don't care who's frowning!" How true is that! And a big thing that rings in my heart is that in our culture today people don't want another show to go to...they are hungry for truth. God's word has never failed on its own...I don't want to feel like I need to dress it up or put on a song and dance...God changes lives through his truth...He says it, I believe it, then I need to do it. Well my heart is alive and I love the Lord...Its all about You JESUS!

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They say laughter is the best medicine...

Current mood:happy

So...I thought I would make a list of some things that really have made me laugh in the past couple days.... -Laura Blakley and I were watching country videos on the Irish chanel and if that wasnt funny enough on its own there was this Irish country singer who was singing on stage and every once in a while would kick up his leg and at the end he sat down on the stage and rolled backwards with his feet in the air, what? haha -yesterday when the guys were taking a lesson in Dromore High they were all standing in the front telling them to come to our show at lunch because there would be surprises and someone else heard prizes and then they went on and on about having prizes AND surprises and maybe its not funny to anyone but me but it was like the AXIOM/comedy hour. -yesterday too in general with Pete being racist towards my Americanisms and laughing and making fun of me the way I laugh and clap my hands and trying to stick his finger up my nose and saying "gosh I'll do whatever I want" and running like Napolean Dynamite, and pretending to be angry at me when I "nip" him and teaching me how to fight by putting my head down and punching him-haha, I already forget what its called. -Oh i CAN NOT leave out Laura's accent with the lisp-it makes me laugh every time and it does Petes head in which in itself makes it more funy (it kinda sounds like the Rocky voice-Kels and anyone else who knows what that is, ask me sometime I will be happy to do it for you) -Oh and i can not leave out this classic although it happened a good 3 weeks ago. So we are taking 2 schools and Rosie is up front doing this game with this group of about 60 kids. So we are asking them to go to different parts of the room which are labled in countries to answer the questions she asks. So Laura had written the questions out and put an A by the question, "where is the great wall of China?" So Rosie asks the question..all the kids run to the China part of the room and Rosie says, well....your all WRONG, becaus the Great Wall of China is in America! You should have seen the teachers faces and the kids were looking around like, what? Oh man I doubled over in laughter with all the team. -Oh ya and on Sunday we had a gig early in the morning at a church and then we went to Belfast after and Suzi bought us lunch. So we try to go into this one resteraunt and Laura has her hoodie on backwards and its really tight and there are no tables for us so we have to go back out and she is running into things cause she cant move in her hoodie and then outside of the resteruant in front of all the windows they tied her up in her hoodie. That was a good day in general, mostly because i got to stand in direct sunlight for about 5 minutes...oh the small things.

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